Library Of Congress Completes Destruction Of 70 Million Works Deemed Culturally Insignificant

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WASHINGTON—Explaining that it had selected the pieces because of their lack of any intellectual, historic, or aesthetic value, the Library of Congress reportedly completed destruction Friday of 70 million works deemed culturally insignificant. “Following an exhaustive six-year audit of our collection, we determined that nearly half the books, recordings, films, photographs, and manuscripts in our archives were of such little consequence to the cultural canon that they were worthy of complete eradication from the American consciousness,” said Librarian of Congress Carla Hayden, explaining that institution officials had, as of this morning, finished incinerating the final batch of meaningless creations, including 15 tons of outdated medical texts, hundreds of 19th-century telegraph line maps, and the 2010 motion picture The Last Airbender, in order to ensure they were not preserved for future generations. “In some cases, such as our vast troves of military march sheet music and photographic negatives of rural Americans quilting, works were selected for destruction based on their lack of artistic merit, while others, like Styx’s The Serpent Is Rising and the movie sequel Grease 2, represent the nadir of a particular historical era. Wiping out these terrible pieces is vitally important to maintaining our proud, rich cultural heritage.” Hayden added that the Library of Congress did elect to preserve the film Con Air, which the board members guiltily admitted they still like to watch, even if it is kind of shitty.

WASHINGTON—Explaining that it had selected the pieces because of their lack of any intellectual, historic, or aesthetic value, the Library of Congress reportedly completed destruction Friday of 70 million works deemed culturally insignificant.

“Following an exhaustive six-year audit of our collection, we determined that nearly half the books, recordings, films, photographs, and manuscripts in our archives were of such little consequence to the cultural canon that they were worthy of complete eradication from the American consciousness,” said Librarian of Congress Carla Hayden, explaining that institution officials had, as of this morning, finished incinerating the final batch of meaningless creations, including 15 tons of outdated...

 

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*Firemen 451 Intensifies*

A little too close.

Well, they do it at zoos...

realDonaldtrump boomroasted

Good riddance to Dragon Ball Z.

Don’t worry, I got this. I backed it all up in my new iPhone...,,But seriously, are these the real numbers? People should be ashamed of themselves. I’ll bet Hillary has been carrying a cigarette lighter in her pocket… Ha ha Ha.....

“the 2010 motion picture The Last Airbender” 😂😂😂 burn every copy haha

Something shameful Among the books on corruption like Trump

constitution seems pretty feckless

Hush, don’t give Trump and his people ideas.

Freakin scary! You had me for a sec!

Is my epic tale of woe & pain 'Pulling Toenails: How to be Annoying', among those saved or burned?

The British did something like this in the 19th century with exchequer records and accidentally burned down their parliament buildings

As long as Classical Electrodynamics by Jackson is on the list, I am good.

Please sneak in Good to Great, Who Moved my Cheese, and whatever other bullshit material managers push on employees so they'll know why they will get laid off next year.

please don’t give them any ideas

Thought this was real for a second

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