Aim for the bushes!
Thought I was looking at an FL Studio project for a second.
How ungrateful. The ground has caught me every single time I've fallen. Thank you, Ground. You're always there for me.
Ground gets no break about this.
I think a bed of spikes might be worse
Idk Cacti or thorny bushes seem like worse options
Won't be painful by the time I hit it lmao
It's never the fall that kills, it's the sudden stop at the end!
I prefer it over spikes
100 percent of people survive the fall! The impact with the ground OTOH!
Missed the word 'least' when I first read that and I thought this was really dark.
Don't jump on the ground then? God, people are so silly, why would you waste your time on this? Is this what journalism has become?
Taliban stronghold a close second, 😂😂
Source?
Checks out
As they say, it's not the fall that kills you, it's the sudden stop.
If we raise the debt ceiling to pay for Republicans tax cuts - that could make the landing softer
Speak for yourself
my teacher just called u unreliable
Anyone else want a GTA remake after seeing this photo.
THERE GOES MY HERO!!!
Haven’t your close combat instructor tell you to be grateful for the ground, it could be a broken glass?
Dark
yes
Just like The Topical is a lousy sleep aid!
Biased. I'd wager spikes are at least equaly undesirable
you forgot a bed of spikes, trumps plain ol ground anyday
Agree
Least desirable? What about punji pits?
Non-skid would like to have a word with you.
I guess, if you don't count metal spikes as a 'surface'.
If there’s blood on my hands, you should let me know If you’re done with the dance, you should let me go Baby you said it all There’s nothing you can say to break my fall
I would add to the excellent advice to be very specific on what you wish for when falling...
It’s unfortunate as we all thought we’d made big strides this past year with 30% softer concrete and a community supported zero glass policy but it’s back to the drawing board. - Zak, treasurer, national association of landing equalization awareness committee
maybe because it breaks more than your fall
Hmmm... I’m not 100% convinced yet. Maybe our “fearless” leader could jump from a tall building to give it a quick fact check. Ya know, just to be sure.
I dunno, it’s looking pretty good right about now
Its not the fall that kills you.
Looks like GTA 2
This is why I propose we reduce gravity.
Looks pretty comfortable to me! 💥
So ground beat out lava pit?
Now to sit back and see if any people eat the onion today
The is great for breaking falls. It provides a large solid suface area that's hard to miss. The rigidity ensures you won't bounce and accidentally get injured.
Can confirm.
can the ground just grow up? like just stop ground
Still the best for keeping your feet on while shooting for the stars. I'm Casey Casem.
Pike filled pits are WAY worse!
I wish I knew that before I jumped. Thanks The Onion. Thanks a lot.
...or The HD Report.
I agree with this 100%. From personal experience last winter I slipped on some black ice and almost shattered my entire ass bone to pieces.
The ground didn’t ask to be there. Pool full of piranhas though...
Study: Dipshit boss still favorite target to land on instead of ground when falling off workplace roof.
fAkE
I thought the onion was fake news but I don’t see how this is wrong
I prefer being impaled on a fence.
Again? Not much competition in this field is there ?
This study is so obviously biased. Big Spike Pit must have funded it. Or maybe Comically Large Razor Blade.
aim for the bushes
Aim for the bushes
You lot are really throwing these out lately. Well done. Is someone dying?
lava
Aaahh GTA II.
GTA 1 reboot looks good.