Dear Abby: My friend offered me no support when I told her about my husband’s cancer diagnosis

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Should I disown (her) as a friend?

DEAR ABBY: I wonder what I should do about a friend I knew through high school and who was a bridesmaid in my wedding. Seven years ago, my husband was diagnosed with tongue cancer and had to have a 16-hour surgery plus chemo and radiation. I called Corinne and told her about my husband’s cancer and surgery, which was at a hospital three hours from our home. She sounded like she cared and was concerned, but she never called or texted me after that.

Now, another girlfriend from high school wants me to attend a lunch with her and Corinne. Should I meet them? Or should I disown Corinne as a friend? It still hurts after all these years. -- WOUNDED IN WISCONSIN DEAR WOUNDED: Before “disowning” Corinne for having let you down when you needed her, go to the lunch with your mutual friend and ask her why she disappeared. She may be embarrassed, but it’s a fair question. Corrine’s absence may have been caused by a terror of cancer and its treatment, which can be so strong that some people are afraid to seek treatment for themselves after they are diagnosed.

 

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