This column is the latest in a series on parenting children in the final years of high school, “Emptying the Nest.” Read the previous installment, about relearning how to be alone at home, here. I recently saw a headline in the New York Times that I thought was the answer to my prayers: “Anxious Parents are the Ones Who Need Help.” Yes, please, I thought, hoping to find acknowledgment of all the very real forces that can turn any parent into an anxious mess.
Occasionally it is acknowledged that larger forces — gun violence; overcrowded schools stripped of arts and vocational programs; racism, sexism, homophobia; the unregulated force of social media — could be contributing factors in our children's perceived problems. More usually, however, the parents somehow shoulder the blame. Either we’re not giving our children enough free time or we’re not monitoring what they do.