hen your partner asks you what you want for dinner, you tell them that you'll eat anything. Perhaps you’re theone in the friend group who’s always down to do whatever others want. Maybe you’d rather hop into a freezing lake than disagree with a coworker. Or, you hate being or want to be perceived as the “easygoing” friend who doesn’t have needs.
While discussing echoism can help people feel seen and supported, it’s important to not pathologize it. “In the realm of psychology, ‘echoist’ and ‘echoism’ are relatively new terms, and there is no current correlated clinical diagnosis in the [Rethinking Narcissism As a result, they may try to minimize, explain away, or avoid any of that commentary or those situations. “This may look like the coworker who seems physically uncomfortable when you praise her productivity or attention to detail or the friend who would rather hide under the covers than have a birthday party where he is the center of attention,” she says.While part of echoism is not saying what you want, it can also entail not knowing what you want, or feeling like you don’t care either way.
From another perspective, they may have had echoist caregivers who modeled this behavior, according to McSparran. “In these situations, echoists learn that it is simply ‘easier’ to minimize themselves in order to avoid further hurt and conflict,” she explains.Dr. Kelley shares this specific example of a childhood environment that can contribute to the development of echoism.
Genatt says self-awareness, self-compassion, and a commitment to personal growth are important starting points for managing the challenges of echoism and are needed on an ongoing basis. Below are practical steps for moving in that direction.Focusing on everyone else all the time can be emotionally exhausting; you deserve to take care of yourself, too. “It’s okay to say ‘no’ when necessary and to prioritize your own needs and well-being,” Genatt says.