| Miss Manners: How to appear concerned but not nosy

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Letter writer wants to show concern when colleagues mention upcoming medical assessments but doesn’t want to seem nosy.

A couple of times now, colleagues have mentioned to me that they are taking a day or a half-day off to undergo medical tests, without giving details. What is an appropriate response, given that they have volunteered this information?I have settled for responding with, “I hope everything is okay.

The proper response is therefore to stall for time while you determine which type they are. “Is there anything you need me to check on while you are out?” mirrors your colleague's ambiguity about whether this conversation is personal or professional — while also, Miss Manners notes, being unclear about how much of their work they can dump on you.Some members of my husband’s family are always late.

To get around this, I think it’s best to lie: to tell them dinner is at 6, when it’s really at 6:45, or that the movie starts at 8 . My husband disagrees with this method, but the constant waiting is getting really old. What do you think?If you are found out, Miss Manners is perfectly willing to have you apologize to the relatives for having mistakenly given them the wrong impression. She just does not think anyone will believe it if repeated too often.

In future, either plan events for which the start time is not important, or tell them you will meet them inside the theater.Lyft passenger says driver took off with his cat. A huge search ensued.

 

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