I'm a doctor, but I never saw my bowel cancer diagnosis coming

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'The blood spatter in the pan was alarming.'

Four months prior to diagnosis, the constipation and occasional blood on the toilet paper was becoming more intrusive. I started to experience an increasing feeling of incomplete bowel emptying , after I’d gone to the toilet. The blood became more noticeable, initially on the paper, but then in the pan, and in July 2018 my bowel habit was, for want of a better expression, frankly explosive. I knew that something was wrong.

By this point, the summer holidays were in full swing, I had been examined, and further blood tests had been requested. I commenced a prescription for regular laxatives and suppositories for presumed piles and possible IBS, and actually I thought my symptoms slightly improved."My beautiful, vivacious mum was dying. Overnight I went from a carefree 30-something to a full-time cancer carer juggling a job.

Despite indulging in every Italian carbohydrate possible, looking back at pictures now, I am convinced I started looking slimmer, despite eating more lavishly while abroad. I found myself rushing to the toilet in the early hours of the morning and on the final day, the blood spatter in the pan was alarming. I braved showing my husband and from the look on his face, I knew immediately I had to go back to my doctor.

My tumour was deemed operable, and I underwent a laparoscopic anterior resection and a total mesenteric excision. The decision was made to give me a temporary ileostomy from a surgical safety perspective, to allow the surgical join to heal where the tumour had been removed. My husband tells me that time stood still for him as he paced the corridors in the hours I was away from him in theatre. I, on the other hand woke up bleary-eyed in the recovery room with beeping machines surrounding me, unaware of my fate. My hand slowly moved towards my belly, knowing I had to firstly find out whether surgery had taken place and secondly, whether there was a stoma. Through the curtain my surgeon’s head appeared.

 

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