MINNETONKA, MN—Admitting it really only made sense to schedule something once her symptoms were severe enough to elicit panic, local woman Kristen Perry told reporters she had put off going to the doctor until her disease was bad enough for him to believe her. “I’d love to get an appointment soon, but it’s just easier
if I show up sick enough to force his hand to actually give me the correct medical care,” said Perry, adding that the last thing she wanted was to jump the gun and show up to her doctor when she wasn’t actively fainting, vomiting, or bleeding, and just be shown the door. “I could go now, but it’s probably wiser to just hold off until I’m screaming in pain, unable to walk, and begging for treatment while I’m days from death’s door.
o point in going unless I can actually get people’s attention by passing out cold on the waiting room floor.” Perry added that she would bide her time by taking all the painkillers she was lazily prescribed by her doctor during the last dozen visits.
This is exactly how Dr's in Ont Can do it. I've heard, 'your condition isn't bad enough to treat yet' all the way up to my cancer diagnosis.
this happens all the time in the us.
Real
The accuracy
'okay but have you tried losing weight?'
uruzrune April fools this is a real article
This rings pretty true. I just don't have enough space to explain myself. I think most married guys know why i don't believe right away.
goldimocks
This is so funny! It reminds me of the time that I had Lyme disease and the doctors were certain I just had stress because I’m a woman, so they gave me Ambien and Lexapro. Then asked if I preferred a diagnosis of MS or Lyme before saying what it was, finally. BWAHAHAHAHAHA
And charge her 300/- for 2 minute meeting for not believing her.
i thought this was supposed to be the onion...
davidasinclair Sorry but this is too real
davidasinclair Same happened to me. My digestive problems were always ridiculed by my doctor. I then went to a colonoscopy. They found 4 polyps.
Everyone knows that having vertigo is a symptom of being a hot girl and it's time the medical establishment recognizes that
But for real
I'm doing exactly this with my knee
davidasinclair 😭😅😂
Ouch! This one hurts!
But...
Bring your husband and the doctor will listen to him.
Are you absolutely sure this is satire?
Lol I've literally has this thought
Hilarious and right on point.
DrPsyBuffy I think they were mining your feed for material.
I have appt on Monday. I’m sure to be told that I have TOO many symptoms. Waited too long I guess.
You're not supposed to post real news.
Guys put off going to the doctor as a way of life. They’ll get used to it.
I remember that one funny time when I had abdominal pain and got sent home from the doctor to “make some time for yourself honey, you’re just stressed” and then I had internal bleeding from Ovarian cysts that night. 😂
Man life sure has gotten challenging for the onion these days 👀
When did Onion go serious journalism?
If I go to the doctor. I've already decided I'm dying. It's over.
Hey I don’t remember being interviewed
Would be funny if it were not so true!
Been there
Ouch
'I don't make jokes. I just watch the government and report the facts.' -Will Rogers
Drama queen
Oof, dark.
nice try women dont get diseases
Too true to be the onion.
I thought y'all only did silly satire. This headline is true.
Easier than getting the insurance company to believe you.
this one is too real to be satire
No point anyway. Doctors are a big scam. They don't know things. Just Google your symptoms and then buy more life insurance.
not even satire
thesamwisest Could always save some time by bring a man with her to explain how her symptoms are affecting him.
American Healthcare described by
Sadly this is very common in shitty US 'healthcare' system.
Way too accurate
I literally have been doing this my whole life.
Are we sure this is The Onion
Third World Problems
this genuinely stung
This IS NOT satire
Me lmao
I thought this was supposed to be sarcastic... when did yall start posting real news? XD
I know this is the onion but this is life for thousands of people
NerdPyle Actually 100% relatable
Onion forgets to be parody, everyone sad
Wait, can someone explain what this connects to irl?
Sad but true…the differential will always come down to migraine or PCOS no matter the symptoms…
area woman unable to walk after painful iud insertion, doctors state 'it can't be that bad'
The Onion, continuing to work for the people.
Yes STD's still make your junk stuff stank.
calilovespan I thought The Onion was supposed to be satire?
Relatable
i’m doing this but unironically
I do this all the time. I can’t call out sick until I’m literally dying
Lol I thought this was supposed to be satire. I literally do this.
Sad but true
This is satire?
In reality this isn't even satire.
Too true to be funny
When the Onion headline is a little too close to true for comfort
Ooof, this is painfully accurate, unfortunately 😔
Most doctors are overpaid, glorified, tech support. Those can't do anything they haven't been told to do, they won't help you unless you fit in a neat little box on a form. Less doctors and more specialized nurses please. I know it's the onion but this crossed the timeline.
this is the reality of the care given by the VA
Brutal! Funny because it’s so true.
babsben Uh, not parody this time.
Too true.
I cannot believe how accurate this is for my mom and dad's case 🤦🏾♀️🤦🏾♀️🤦🏾♀️
I thought you were supposed to be satire
phyll_indablank Art imitates life. My cousin had unusual symptoms for two years and was told it was 'all in her head'. By the time she finally convinced the docs to send her to a specialist, he told her she had pancreatic cancer, and if she'd gotten in 6 months sooner, he could have saved her.
Likely true
Area Woman barely able to walk due to hip pain sent to palatial Women's Clinic for routine mammogram.
I thought the Onion was meant to be satire?
This.
Applies to all underserved e.g., PoC.
Oh ain’t it da truth!
Sadly Very realistic sarcasm
Yet another priceless article. 👌
I thought The Onion was satire
it´s funny because it´s true. in my case, i had to wait 2 1/2 years for my diagnosis. I could barely walk and in pain but acording to them i was fine.
Maybe she should go to a hospital instead of a casting couch.
That's a real headline, .
You got this backwards. This is what men do.
it's funny because it's true
Woman is many of us 🤣
Sad, but the truth.
This is just... reality, no?
Damn
Are you posting satire, or the sad standard procedure for the average US woman?
😂😂😂
Doctors can be women too. Quite offended right now.
I know this is the Onion, but this hits home for a lot of women.