Tammy Smith is sharing her brother's story in the hopes of preventing another family from going through losing a loved one to suicide. - ContributedTammy D. Smith is a human resources management professional who lives in St. John's with her two sons and her Shih Tzu. She's hopeful that by sharing her story, it may help others impacted by suicide and open a dialogue to prevent any future losses from this serious, tragic epidemic which is occurring in our country.
My brother was 10 years my senior, but that day I just nodded and smiled to myself and thought,"This just might be the coolest guy on the planet - and he is MY brother…."'A different grief': Trauma of suicide loss hard to understand, say N.L. women who are finding solace in reviving west coast support groupMy brother was an instrumental mentor and inspiration to me in my life. From as early as I can remember, music was the one thing that really bonded us together.
My brother picked out my first guitar for me – a Yamaha, which I still have to this day. At the age of eight, my desire and interest turned from learning piano to playing the guitar. From the moment I picked up the guitar, our tradition started. We would spend hours upon hours playing together, with me singing and playing rhythm and him making the guitar talk with his incredible self-taught guitar skills.
As the years passed, his passion moved to salmon fishing, and he became an avid salmon angler. Each morning at 3 a.m., he would head to his favourite fishing hole and fly fish for a salmon before heading to work. It really did become his most favourite pastime; he truly loved it! Anyone who knew him, knew his passion.This past summer, I had the privilege to spend time in the heart of our province where our phenomenal salmon rivers reside.
I remember, as we talked and cried through the wee hours of that night and following days, trying to make sense of this.Coming out of that, I rested on the knowledge that it was in those few minutes of uninterrupted time he couldn’t see beyond. That feeling in our lungs that we can never fully breathe. That feeling that, in some warped sense, you are suspended in time.
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