Bullshit Alternative Medical Procedures You Should Never Have Done

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Anything other than a large chunk of amethyst hanging from your neck is basically a scam and a waste of time.

Being Unable To Afford Consistent Or Quality Medical CareYou really shouldn’t have gone down that road.Anything With ‘Lavender’ In The NameAdvertisementNo human being needs to attain such a crippling level of insight into the deep recesses of their subconscious.This tried-and-true method of healing wears off after a few hours and is not recommended long-term.

Countless lives and years were lost on your doomed expedition when you could’ve just tried cutting down on salt.The calypso beat may be soothing at first, but don’t be surprised if you leave with vertebrae that are totally out of tune.Surgery can be risky, but you were never going to detach your conjoined twins by rubbing some clove on their heads.There are much better ways to remove eye gunk than sticking a 10-inch wax candle into your socket.

If you need a kidney transplant, you can’t just substitute a heart, even though the heart seems like a smart alternative.We know you’re squeamish around blood, but barbecue sauce just isn’t as effective at providing oxygen to your muscles and organs.You put yourself through a lengthy and exhausting ritual just to rid yourself of a demon that usually responds well to acetaminophen.

 

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Please tell us you call out that bullshit, exercise, that is such a fad.

Sap chugging? Gotta try that one.

The Onion speaking the truth again!

Did you try burning books ?

Your conjoined twin. Better that way.

Stacking sugarcubes to reach for the medical encyclopedia from 1891 ? will that give me diabetes ?

NGL that car massage looks kinda good

Homeopathy Anything with “detox” in the title

Sap chugging.......

We need one for all the bullshit procedures of conventional medicine. Arthroscopy anyone?

Sorry but I'm never giving up going to the bar to alleviate my problems.

Any surgery- even outpatient- without getting a second opinion. And less funny when one still can’t breathe after

Filipino healers surgery

How dare you. I participated in Sap Chugging and now I can lift trucks. Proper science.

Wait aren’t these what Republicans try?

But it is delicious 🤤

I clicked the fucking link AND all the fucking slides

*slurring* 'You don't know me!'

Getting the vax.

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