ATLANTA—Claiming that the health risks from the novel coronavirus were relatively minor, public health experts announced Wednesday that, given proper precautions, it was safe for students to return to those weird little private schools where they have class in a barn.
“Our research has indicated that the school year should be able to resume without incident in tiny educational facilities where there are only like 15 students to begin with and most of them are related anyway,” said CDC director Robert Redfield, telling reporters that a largely outdoor curriculum consisting of digging in a community garden and dancing around a Maypole presented a low likelihood of transmission.
In a related story, Onion looks for new writers after their entire writing staff go back to school. TheOnionSucks
'And, then I said, 'Stop... in the name of love...''
It’s funny cause it’s true
That’s my high school hi :-D
I'm so happy for the kids on ' little house on a prairie '.
A little too on the snout of a pig named Hamilton. susancuellar squareonekendra
I know Onion is legit fake news but this article doesn’t even seem fake anymore 😂😂😂
MillerBenjaminA
😂
that's USC!!! *giddy screams*
Good to know
all the teachers have small hands and smell like cabbage
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